How to Be a Democrat Without Being an Absolute Lunatic
Practical guide
Congratulations on your decision to embrace the Democratic Party. You're joining a group dedicated to progress, equality, and endless virtue signaling. But don’t worry—there’s a way to be a Democrat without transforming into the type who spends their weekends blocking traffic for climate change or weeping uncontrollably at Starbucks over reusable straws.
This guide will help you walk that delicate line between left-leaning idealism and full-blown lunacy. Ready? Let’s dive in.